Give Honor

Much of our society is disintegrating simply because of a lack of honor. Our culture was built on respect and honor. When we honor people, we add value to them. In a culture of honor, people are empowered to high thinking and living.

Everybody wants to be on the receiving end of honor but few people want to initiate it. I’ve learnt that you’ll never have what you’re not willing to give. Great men and women are those who are secure in themselves. They can recognize the greatness in others. Our own peace and prosperity are directly tied to the honor we give to others.

Recently, a friend of mine joined me on a mission trip to China. One of his sons has lived a very colorful life and he’s finally coming around to serving the Lord. Just before we left for China, his son came to him and handed him $350 and told him that he wanted to honor his labor for the Lord. This young man works for a multinational corporation and they were laying people off left and right. His own job was on the line. He asked his Dad to pray that he would not lose his job. My friend prayed for his son and reminded him that a thousand may fall at his side but it shall not come near him (Psalm 91:7). Miraculously, the son survived the final cut. Today, he has a permanent job. He gets almost a whole month of paid holiday leave. He has full insurance benefits for his family. And he even has a 401K started in his name. You may think this is no big deal but you have to understand; this young man has never had a job this good. I believe that all of this happened for the young man because he honored his Dad by sending him off to serve God in China.

The Scripture says, “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12 NIV). In fact, it is one of ten commandments God gave us. When we honor people, we are honoring God.

One of the first places we should practice honor is in our own homes. Often we’re slowest in honoring those who sacrifice the most for us. One definition of honor is to respect that which is given to someone who is admired. Husbands and wives can show honor to each other by doing what their spouse prefers. Husbands, honor your wives (I Peter 3:7). Wives, as long as you hold back in honoring your husbands with your words and deeds, he will never reach his full potential. Don’t be stingy in expressing honor. Let us set an example for our children and allow them to learn from us. You don’t have to agree with everybody but honor your parents, in-laws, outlaws, and those relatives who don’t think and speak well of you. No dishonorable situation is made better by dishing dishonor. Why don’t you become the agent of change and establish a culture of honor in your home? You’ll be surprised at how fast it catches on.

We should honor people in the marketplace. Honor your neighbors by turning down the volume of your party. In church, honor the usher and sit where he tells you. Give honor to the clerk at the store by being courteous. Prefer the other person. When we give heed to people in authority with a good attitude, we’re sowing honor. I’ve found that the amount of God’s favor in my life is directly linked to the honor I bestow on others. Let’s give honor because it glorifies God.

In the Bible, King Saul tried to kill David in spite of his loyalty to the king. On multiple occasions, David had the opportunity to hurt Saul but he understood the principle of honor. Could it be that David rose to the throne because he knew how to honor those in authority? Today we live in a culture where we’re quick to criticize anyone, from the President down to our own family members. Is this an area where God is prompting you to come up higher? Instead of criticizing, let us pray for them. Let us honor the people we love. Honor people by telling them what a great job they’re doing. None of us got here on our own. Let us honor our parents by calling them regularly and visiting them whenever possible. When we cultivate a culture of honor, we will raise the bar for all, God’s blessings will pursue us, and we’ll live long on earth. Friend, you are loved, celebrated, and honored. Remember, God's favor will be upon your life to the degree you honor others. I honor you!

“Give honor to whom honor is due.” (Romans 13:7).

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What Would Jesus Think of Church Today

Going to church on Sunday has become a Christian tradition all over the world. For some, Sunday is the holy-day when we rest and honor God. For others, church is becoming less relevant to their busy lifestyle.

What would Jesus think if He walked into our church service today?

While a part of being a Christian is to connect with other believers, wanting to be social for personal gain should never be the reason for going to church. When our motive is to get close to the pastor, leader or other believers for personal advancement, then we’re jeopardizing our faith. WHY we do what we do is far more important than what we do. Remember, God still looks at the intent of our hearts!

A major emphasis is placed on what we’re going to “get” when we go to church. We use phrases like, “What did you get from church today?” For a New Testament believer, it should be just the opposite. We don’t go to church to “get” but to GIVE our praise, worship and adoration to God from whom all blessings flow. We also should bring hope, encouragement and practical help to one another while we’re in church. Sure God will give us what we need for our daily life but our goal should be to GIVE rather than to get – an attitude of gratitude.

What would Jesus think of our leaders in the church today? Jesus looked at Peter and commissioned him to “feed my sheep.” Yet, many pastors today are using the pulpit to “beat the sheep.” Often congregations are put through guilt trips for not coming to church often enough or not giving more of their money to church. Other pastors are obsessed with their theology and doctrines. Their ego is bigger than life! Church leaders, here’s what Jesus would remind us, “Feed my sheep and lead them to green pastures where My presence is.” As leaders our main job is to create an environment for people to encounter God. Sinners need hope, the sick need healing and the oppressed needs to be set free. Saints need to be empowered into action; not just to come to church on Sunday and coerced into giving 10% of their income to the church (by the way, why are we obsessed with the 10% when 100% belongs to God in the first place?) but also to live the rest of the week being salt and light to the world.

I wonder what Jesus would think about “bodyguards” in the church today! Jesus made Himself vulnerable even to His enemies who came to kill Him. He willingly gave Himself up for us. Why is it that leaders have to surround themselves with secret-service-looking body guards? Do you know how a church leader and his church get recognized by the government in communist Laos? In my recent trip to the country, I was told that every pastor of a new church is arrested and put in prison for 6-12 months. If they survive the persecution and torture without giving out the names, protecting his members, they come out free to conduct services and recognized by the government. This test of commitment is the same in majority of the world including communist China, where Christianity is exploding! In return, believers remain committed to the church for the rest of their lives.

Brothers and sisters, going to church should not be an obligation. We should go there to worship God. We should congregate to lift, encourage and help one another. We should go to church to be saved and healed from our hurts and pain. A church should be a hospital to heal the broken, hurting, sighing and dying people not a showcase to display perfect people. Pastors should be more concerned about delivering people than delivering sermons. When we allow the Holy Spirit to move among us, we will see the power of the church restored to her original glory. Heathens will be drawn to church when they see our love for one another. God is far more interested in our lifestyle rest of the week than the weekly two hours we spend in the church. Jesus said, “My house will be called a house or prayer.” Let’s pray. Let’s worship. Let’s learn and become Disciples of Christ. When we reflect God’s love and light to our lost world we will encounter His glory again!

“He said to them, "The Scriptures declare, 'My Temple will be called a house of prayer,' but you have turned it into a den of thieves!" (Matthew 21:13 NLT).

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5 Traits of a Great Leader

Most of us would not consider ourselves as leaders but all of us are leaders to someone in some ways. We can abdicate our roles as leaders or we can step up to the plate and become the leader God wants us to be.

Like everything else the best principles of being a great leader is found in the Bible. Millions of people today are living below their potential because we’ve not understood the call to leadership. Let’s discuss a few traits of a great leader.

Leaders have vision. Everything rises and falls within leadership. Whether it is in your family, work, church or business, the vision of a leader gives it life and direction. The Bible says, without a vision people perish. If you want peace, financial stability and growth in your marriage, family or church, you will have to have a clear vision of what you want to achieve or where you want to go. Divide the vision into bite-size short, mid and long-term goals. Clear vision empowers people to accomplish individual and corporate task in a timely manner.

Leaders are excellent communicators. When we fail to plan we plan to fail. Communication is the key to every successful relationship and project. The more clearly we communicate with our team the better results we will have. Written down communication and repetition of the vision enables people to capture what needs to be done and what is expected of every individual. Different people may play different role but a leader’s job is to make each person feel important about their contribution. One of the best ways to get the best results you want is to inspect what you expect along the way. Every day, empower people by saying, “I appreciate you getting your school done on time.” “You’re amazing! I know you’re going to meet the deadline by 4:00 PM today. I believe in you!” People either live up to what you say or down to what you say. Effective leaders have a great follow up system in place.

Leaders engage the whole team. People’s personalities are different. Some of the quieter, unsocial people are also more creative and talented. A leader’s job is to recognize the different gifts in people. When we engage the least of the team-member by giving them equal recognition, they too will perform to their highest potential. The more we value people and gradually increase their responsibilities the higher they’re going to rise. Positive words of affirmation and sincere compliments bring out the best in people. Negativity does the opposite. A great leader knows how to engage the shy, introverted people by drawing them into the vision and giving them public recognition for their contribution.

Leaders empower the weak. Most people are beaten down by the world and have very little self-esteem. When they relate to us, they usually come with past baggage of insecurity, self-doubt and condemnation. A great leader knows how to inspire and empower a person with battered life experience. A phrase I use regularly is, “I believe in you! You’re going to do great!” When we speak faith into people, they will be faithful! A great leader always make people believe more than what they believe about themselves.

Leaders serve. The world’s definition of leadership is skewed today. It says the higher we go up the ladder the greater we need to be served. However, a great leader is one who knows how to stoop down to lift another person up. It takes a big person to do something small. Never be too big or too influential to serve others. If we want to serve God, we need to serve people. The ladder to success is the ladder to service.

Friend, you’re born to be a leader. Why don’t you get up from the sideline? Shut out the condemning voices of the enemy of your past mistakes. I declare: You’re born to do great things. You’re a great Dad. You’re an awesome mother. You’re a great wife. You can do anything you want. God has chosen you for a purpose. Walk in it! You’ve got what it takes. Leaders rise up; you’re the hope of our world!

“Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else.” (Mark 10:43-44 NLT).

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How to Build God’s House

 

Every time I come back from a missions trip I’m fired up about the Church in America. Any attempt to bring people to church is commendable. As in the Church in Asia, if we follow God’s ways, our churches will explode.

 

We do so many things to attract people and often with very little results. I know pastors and church leaders have good intentions but when we’re building God’s House, we’ve to use His blueprint. Today let’s discuss how to make your church grow.

 

Check your motives. Why is often the answer to how! If we get our motives right, we’ll find God on our side to attract people to His House. The main reason for a church to exist should be to worship God corporately and win souls to Christ. Anything less than keeping the focus on God will stifle our church growth.

 

Focus on praise and worship. Teach your congregation to come to church to worship God. We need to shift our thinking from, “What I’m going to get” to “What I’m going to give to God.” When we go to God’s House to give for what He has already done this week, we’ll find more of God’s blessings following us. Where there’s a heart full of praise there’s little room for complaints. Gratitude should be our attitude for going to church.

 

Meet the needs of the people. A church is not a place to display God’s perfect saints. Church should be more like a hospital where the broken-hearted, hurt and lost people find love and hope in Christ. The Church in Asia is thriving in spite of severe persecution and hardships because every believer going through rough time is prayed for personally. One of the best ministries you can establish in a church is a prayer ministry team who will take time to pray for the lost and hurting people.

 

Minimize the money talk. Commercialism is rampant in today’s modern church. Problem is the more we talk about giving money to church the more we turn people away from it. Begging, pleading and manipulating people to give more every week isn’t very inspiring. People know it costs money to pay staff, electric bills and maintain a building. A better way to encourage people to give is to tell and show them what their money is doing to change people’s lives.

 

Feed, not beat the sheep. Not your church; but many churches focus on preaching messages that are condemning and loaded with guilt trip. We all need correction and exhortation from time to time. But if we preach rules and laws as staple then we’ll lose people. Sinners know they’ve sinned. They need to know that God still loves them and they can return to Him. Facilitate people to encounter God! Preach the message of hope, healing and personal empowerment for daily living. Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.”

 

Promote community. We have a need to belong. God made human beings to live in community. Our churches should have small groups where they can interact with each other, know their names and do life together. When we serve each other in homes, we add value to each other and make them feel like belonging to the family of God.

 

Talk about world missions. There’s a severe drop in churches that are talking about reaching the world. Those who are talking are not doing much about it because they feel it’s a drain on their finances. Yet, just the opposite is true. If you want your church to flourish, put world missions on the forefront of everything. The dearest and closest thing to God’s heart is the salvation is mankind. When we challenge our people to reach the world, we invite God’s favor into our churches. Last but not the least, support Israel!

 

“Now I say to you that you are Peter (which means 'rock'), and upon this rock I will build my church, and all the powers of hell will not conquer it” (Matthew 16:18 NLT).

 

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How to Increase Your Sales

You may not be directly involved in a sales job but all of us are selling ourselves. Whether we provide a service or a product or even peace of mind such as insurance, or a relationship - we all need to master the skills of sales.

I have many friends who have outstanding products but they’re sitting in the dark. Today, let’s discuss simple principles to jump-start your sales and bring you immediate increase.

First, the product! If you want great sale, you must have a great product. If the product is designed to provide a service or increase productivity then you have a valid commodity in hand. Know your product. Find out what it can do for people.

Market effectively. Big companies spend top dollars on advertisement for a reason – it works! How you market your product will determine how much it will sell. I have a friend who is very intelligent and has a great product to offer. However, his sales pitch is very confusing. He doesn’t have a clear presentation. Therefore, his business is struggling. If you want to increase your sales, you have to market the benefit of your products over and over with as many people as possible.

Build trust. Hoping to make a quick sale, many people make the mistake of pushing their product before building trust. We may succeed in making a quick sale here and there but if you want to build life-long customer base, then you have to invest time, effort and energy in your prospective customer. When we take the time to understand what the customer want and how to best serve that need, then we’ll have clients waiting on us.

Give a custom-made experience. Most successful businesses are those that are flexible. People don’t buy product or services; they buy the experience of you and your establishment. Recently, I was with my daughter Sabrina, buying breakfast in a cozy London restaurant. They had a long list of menu but I just wanted some eggs and hash brown. When I asked the waitress, she was more than willing to serve my request. It was delicious and I left a generous tip. The next day, we wanted to try a different restaurant. When we sat down I asked for the same breakfast. This time the response was, “We don’t have that on the menu; we don’t serve that.” I was taken back at the owner’s response and I almost wanted to leave. We’re the only people in the restaurant and I didn’t want to be rude. So we endured the unfriendly service. The difference between the two restaurants was vast in their attitude. One was there to serve and give us a custom-made experience while the other was just going through the motion. Guess where we ate breakfast the next day!

Be patient. A “no” for now is not “NO” forever. Customers are in the process of making decisions. Give people some time. In our recent missions trip to India, we’re driving to our meeting place when a young boy on the street approached my window to sell a banana. I like to help people but I also like to know their story. It wasn’t more than a minute when the youngster got tired of my questions. I had money in my hand ready to buy his bananas but he left! Soon we stopped to pay toll at a toll booth. Another young boy came trying to sell us corn. This young boy was hungry and he was patient. He started running beside our car when we took off. We stopped and gave him a day’s wage. The first boy got impatient but the second young man got blessed with hundred bananas!  What’s the point? Be patient. If your customers are not ready to buy right now, keep educating them about the benefits of your products and services. From time to time, go back to the “closed doors” and offer your services again. You’ll be amazed how your sales will increase!

Last but not the least; ask God for favor in your business. Bring God to work with you. He will open doors for you that no man can shut. You’re designed to have plenty. If you practice these simple principles, your sales will go off the roof.

“The LORD will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none” (Deuteronomy 28:12 NIV).

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Parenting with a Purpose

Kids are a lot of fun. They’re truly a gift from God. Our main job is to train and help them find God’s purpose for their lives. Easier said than done, parenting is one of the most challenging yet rewarding job in the world.

Our culture is having an effect on our children more and more. What was unacceptable just a few decades ago is normal now. Every parent has their right to raise their own kids but there are some Biblical principles, if followed, our children will be mighty in the land.

The other day, my friend was telling me how her daughter confessed to acting up and not having a best attitude with her mom. My friend is very passionate about raising Godly kids. When she asked her daughter what would prevent her from acting up again, she said, “Spending more time with you Mom!”

Kids spell love T-I-M-E. One of the greatest needs our kids have today is to spend quality and quantity time with their parents. When they feel loved, affirmed and accepted, they perform better all around. In our pursuit of happiness, business and career, sometimes we forget what we’re working for. Don’t let that be you. If we’re to enjoy our kids the rest of our lives, then it is wise for us to invest in them now. What we deposit in our children is far more important than what we deposit for them.

Discipline is one of the best ways to show love to our kids. We all need boundaries; why spare the kids? The Bible teaches us to train our children (age appropriate manner). If we don’t spare the rod when they’re young, our children will go through life with lot more success and lot less drama. When we spend time with our children, we earn the right to discipline them when and as needed. Discipline with love is how God deals with us. We should do the same with our kids.

Another great key to parenting is to focus on the majors. Don’t lose sleep over potty training your child. I’ve never seen a twenty-year-old going around in diapers. When we have a relaxed and easy going attitude at home, we’re sending a positive signal to our kids. Remember, people are more important than stuff. Dirty carpet can be cleaned but your kids will be kids only once. Don’t sweat the small stuff!

As the children grow older, teach them responsibility. They’re never too young to start. If we enable them to have an entitlement mentality, they’ll grow up thinking the world owes it to them. A better way is to teach them responsibility and reward them for it.

Spirituality is caught more than it’s taught. I know many Christian parents struggling to keep their kids interested in God. One of the best ways we can impart spirituality to our kids is to be an example. Read your Bible every day; spend time in prayer and fasting. Go to church regularly. Practice what you preach. Disciples are made not born.

As the kids reach adulthood, shift your parenting to consulting. Give advice and counsel only when it’s sought for. I’m planning to charge my kids for advice when they get older. Our children need the space to make their own discovery. They will make mistakes. Be gracious, understanding and patient. Don’t criticize, demean or condemn them. There’ll be enough people in the world to do that. Love, laugh and celebrate together. Don’t just endure your kids, enjoy them. If any of your kids young or old is not walking with God today, keep praying for them. They have no chance when you pray. You may not have had a good example of a parent but now you do. Let’s imitate our Heavenly Father! Parenting is an awesome responsibility. Let’s raise our kids with a purpose and enjoy them!

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 ESV).

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Health is Wealth

God created us in different shape, size and form. We’re not supposed to look like Barbie doll but we’re all supposed to live healthy. Our body is not only where we live but it is also where God lives. We’re responsible to take care of our health.

We’re all made up of body, mind, spirit and soul. Therefore, it is not just enough to focus on physical exercise we need to also pay attention to our mental and spiritual health. Today, let’s discuss some of the major areas we can improve our health.

Get active. There’s a tremendous awareness in our society about the benefit of staying fit. Many of you my friends are shining example of staying fit. Facebook is full of entries of exercise triumphs. I love it! Some of my friends are exercising both for them and me. Most of us however need to make an effort for it. I’m not greatly motivated to exercise but I’ve realized this, if I don’t do what’s needed now, I’ll live shorter and unproductive life. Here’s the simple key. Exercise! No matter what you do, how long and how often – get active. Anything you do is better than nothing.

Don’t worry! Worry and stress will send you early to grave. We’re all tempted to worry about something every day. When we worry, we change nothing. A Nepalese proverb says, “The tiger in our mind is bigger than the tiger in the jungle.” We often worry about things that have no basis for it.

Yesterday, I had lunch with an old friend. I had brought my laptop with me to show him some pictures of what God was doing on the mission field. I had put my computer down by my chair and when we got done visiting, I completely forgot about my laptop. I drove almost fifteen minutes before I remembered my laptop. I start to worry. I took a sharp U-turn but I was distraught. I had all my important documents in my laptop. Negative stories of my friends loosing stuff began to flood my mind. The tigers in my mind were becoming bigger and bigger. Finally, I remembered what I often advise people to do – prayer! I prayed briefly and asked God to protect my laptop. When I returned to the restaurant, I looked under my table and there was no computer. I panicked! When I asked the staff at the counter, she said, “What color is your computer?” I said, “It’s an HP, gray color.” Immediately, she handed me my computer. I was so relieved! I thanked God and walked away happy. The point of this story is: we can worry or we can pray. Prayer brings results worry destroys our health.

Watch your intake. A great emphasis has been put on our eating intake. It’s important that we eat and drink healthy. A lot more sinister enemy is what we feed our minds. When we watch negative news reports over and over, when we indulge in trash TV and internet we damage ourselves much greater than bad choices of food. It’s ok to stay current with news and world affairs but don’t get addicted to negative media or attitude. Keep a positive picture of yourself and the world. Protect your mental health by guarding what you read, listen and watch. The movies that play in your mind most frequently will be the reality you’ll live in life. Turn off the negative feeds.

Serve others. One of the most selfish things you can do for yourself is to serve others. When you help others, you release a happy hormone called endorphin. A sense of purpose, self-worth and significance will rejuvenate your body, mind and soul. Reach out to at least one person every day. When you’re a blessing to others, God Himself will bless you. Friends, let’s take care of our body. Our health is our wealth!

“Worship the LORD your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you” (Exodus 23:25 NIV).

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Don’t Lose Your Brand

Brand is the name, term, design, symbol, or any other feature that identifies one seller's product distinct from those of other sellers. When we think about a brand, it stands out in our mind from the masses. Our brand is our identity.

Airplanes are made to fly. Ships sail and cars drive. No matter how big, fancy and powerful they are its useless unless they perform to do what they’re made for. People spend millions trying to secure their brand. What is your brand? What do people think of when they think about you?

When people think of me I want them to think of two things – inspiration and world missions. I do a lot of things but empowering people with the Word of God and bringing the Gospel to the nations are the focus of my life. Being in the ministry, kind people offer me all sorts of opportunities because they’re trying to help our organization. I appreciate their offer but kindly I have to turn them down. I’ve learnt this principle in life: every opportunity is not for me. I must be true to the vision God gave me and that is inspiration and world missions.

If we’re to be successful in life, we have to find and cultivate our brand. In order to be effective, you cannot be a master of all. You may do many things but don’t let your brand be so broad that people can’t think of one thing that you stand for. People and businesses that thrive are those who understand and cultivate their brand.

U2 is my favorite band in the world. I love their music. I’ve been a fan of this Irish band since they became famous with their hit “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.” After thirty years, they’re still writing outstanding music and fans like me are following them. If you didn’t know, U2’s front man Bono does a lot of humanitarian work, especially in Africa. He’s also a political activist. He challenges rich nations to forgive foreign debts of the poor countries. They do a lot of inspiring things but their staple is still churning good music. That is the number one reason why they’re still in business and thriving. What’s your brand? What brings out the best in you?

I find people who have great ideas and vision but they never take the time to hone down their trade. They offer multiple services and lack laser focus in their vision. It’s okay to have multiple source of income but don’t juggle two or three businesses until you’re successful at one. You only have a limited energy and resources every day. Everything you do takes your time, effort and energy. If you’re spreading yourself too thin, you won’t have the time to develop anything and you’ll miss out.

When Jesus got started in the ministry, John sent his disciples to check Him out. He wasn’t critical but John wanted to know what Jesus was about? So he replied to the messengers, "Go back and report to John what you have seen and heard: The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is proclaimed to the poor. (Luke 7:22 NIV). Jesus was saying, “I’m the Savior, Healer and the Deliverer of mankind!”

Friend, what is your brand? Have you strayed from the original vision God gave you? Are your fingers in too many pies? Do the people think of any one thing when they think about you? Are you spread too thin? Every opportunity that comes along your way is NOT for you. Focus on the one thing God has gifted you with. Don’t be a Jack of all trades. Be a master of one thing and all Jacks will gather around you! Whatever you focus on will grow. As you become successful in one thing, you’ll be amazed how every other area of your life will also start to flourish. Stick to your brand. Go back to the basics. Do what you’re best at and you’ll rise to the top. Don’t lose your brand! I’m praying for you.

“I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:14 ESV).

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Family Matters

With back to school fever, parents, grandparents and children are shifting into new gear. Summer holidays were fun but now it’s time to settle back into the routine. Our family is a gift from God and we should not take it for granted.

One reason the family has been so much under attack is because it represents God the most. For decades now the family values have been reduced to shreds. But a family belongs to God and He will not allow it to fizzle out. Fads come and go but our families are here to stay. Therefore, we might as well learn to get along with each other. We shouldn’t just endure our family but enjoy them.

Everything God does have an order. The solar system circles in a certain motion. The waves of the sea have rhythms and even the law of nature operates in a certain order. If a family has to be healthy it must also have God’s order at home. Today let’s discuss a few principles from God’s Word about family matters.

First, the husbands! It is God’s plan for the husband to be the head of the family. Let me assure you, men did not come up with this idea. God did! Many men have abdicated their role as the leader of the family and that’s why we have such havoc in our society. Leadership is not to be confused with dictatorship. Leadership is making sure the right person is making the right decision. Involve your wife in important decision making process. It’s smart because if the plan fails you have someone else to share the blame with! Men it is not enough to be lions in your career but now it is time for you to lead your family in spiritual things. Don’t just provide for our family financially but provide for their emotional, mental and social needs also. You’ve got to make her feel secured of your love and provision in every area. Your wife and children need your praise, understanding and validation. Give up control and allow your wife freedom. More is caught than taught. Children become what they hear. Lavish them with affirmation. Catch them doing something right and brag about it. Teach your children responsibilities, Godly values and establish healthy boundaries. Discipline is still in God’s Book. Unconditional love is like glue that binds your family together. If we want our women to follow us as the church needs to follow Christ then we must also lay down our lives in service to our family God gave us. Remember, no man was awarded for what he received but what he gave.

Ladies, you’re beautiful so your job is to make everything beautiful. God has given you incredible gift to love and nurture your family. You look most beautiful when you operate as the “helper.” A woman’s value is the same as of the husband but our roles are different. Don’t assume the roles of your husband, it makes him feel inadequate. The most important thing your husband need from you is respect and honor. The more you brag about him in private and in public the better he will perform. Remember, men are little boys trapped in large bodies. Don’t focus on the 20% your husband may not be best at rather focus on the 80% he’s good at. Let God change him. He’s got a heavy Hand! When you create an atmosphere that is filled with fun, peace and laughter, everybody will want to hang around the house. Just the opposite is also true when a home is filled with strife and stress. Don’t sweat the small stuff. You don’t always have to agree on everything. When you cannot agree on an issue with your husband, yield and let him make the final decision. Be comfortable but look your best at home as you do in public. Your tenderness mixed with gracefulness and prayers are mighty weapons that will melt every heart. You are the most valuable treasure in the family!

The scripture says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord.” Turn down the volume and turn up the respect. There will be authorities you’ll have to submit to all your life; start practicing at home. You’ll live long and it will go well with you. Your parents are the only free life lessons you’ll have. Take their advice; it will save you a lot of heartaches. Learn, grow, belong - your family is the only thing God chose for you. Accept and admire your family. Dedicate yourself to the things of God and high ambitions and you’ll see success in every step of your life. Don’t like what I have to say about today? Talk to God! These are His ideas.

God’s thoughts on family: (Ephesians 5:22 – 6:4, Colossians 3:18-21, I Peter 3:1-12).

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For Leaders Only

We all have a God-given nature in us to help others win. The best leaders are those who help other people succeed. Being a leader is not always easy but its rewards are great. The fact that you’re reading this today tells me that you’re a great leader.

Leadership is all about people. Jesus summarized the Ten Commandments into two. We must love God and people. We cannot love one without the other. Today we will talk about how to inspire others to rise to the top.

Affirm the positive in people. Religion has taught us that God is sitting up in heaven waiting for us to make a mistake so He can punish us. This is sad but just the opposite is true. God is looking for us to do one thing right so that He can promote us. We should operate in the same way. Instead of throwing dirt on people, we ought to dig for the gold in others. Most people know when they’re doing wrong and what they need to do to correct it. When we affirm the positive in people, we fuel them to come up higher. I’ve found people do more of what we brag about and less of what we nag about. Let’s maximize the positives and minimize the negative.

Highlight the good. None of us have arrived. We are all work in progress. Whether we’re at work or with our family, we all have goals, standards and expectations. When people are putting their best effort forward, we have to spotlight the growth and not the weakness. Dwell on the good.  When we focus on the strength and growth of others we’re helping them come up higher.

Celebrate the victory. We like to talk about our own success and reminiscence our own victories. When we celebrate the success of others we add value to them. When you hear about someone overcoming a struggle or buying their first new home, or a better car, get excited with them. Don’t dwarf their victory by immediately sharing one of your own. Let the people bask in their glory for a while. It’s healthy for them. Small victories set people up to overcome the big ones. People will make mistake. Minimize the failure and celebrate the victory.

Develop a habit of encouraging others. When we encourage people we give them courage to achieve the impossible. The other day I had a lunch appointment. The restaurant was very busy and waiters were stretched thin. When a young man came to serve us I sincerely said, “I like your tie.” He came by our table multiple times making sure we’re taken care of. I left him a good tip. Encouragement is like a cork floating in a bucket. The more encouragement, love, respect and honor you pour into the bucket the higher the cork will rise. This is especially true in marriage and other close relationships. When you’re close to someone, you not only see all their strength but also their flaws. We have to decide whether we want to add or drain honor to the bucket. Our encouragement helps people rise higher and perform better.

Think the best of people. If there are two ways to think about someone – think the best. Consistent people do inconsistent things. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Develop a negative into a positive picture! Assume the best in people. Give people something to live up to.

Friend, we are to be a light into our world God. We’re preaching a sermon with our lives at all times. When we live and do what’s right, we’re drawing people to Christ. Our action speaks louder than our words. Let’s draw people to Christ and not push them away. When we help others rise to the top, we elevate our own position. Helping others is not an option; it’s mandatory to our own growth. Let’s lead by example and by inspiration. Look for the gold in people. Celebrate people. Encourage others. What we do for others, God will make happen for us. You’re an excellent leader. I believe in you!

“Whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant” (Matthew 20:26 ISV).

Click Here to Spread the Message of Hope: www.buildinternational.org

Book Sandy Anderson as Speaker: Call 972 800 4346, Email: buildinternational@sbcglobal.net 

Stay Inspired: http://www.facebook.com/pages/BUILD-International-Ministries/113937368637778?ref=hl